Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Five dollar footlongs....

I apologize for my absence for the past week and a day or two, being away has helped me. I have regained a bit of perspective that I had lost for the past while. New or renewed perspective is always a good thing. I also realized how many read my blog---I have always known about my friends and family of course, (they are the reason I write here, after all), but now I have a good idea about my stalkers, and stalkers are always welcome here, but I frankly am surprised at the number of them I have that know me IRL. You know how that is, you try and think...did I offend any of them at any time? When you worry about that, it really is time to shut it all down. I started writing here for me, almost two years ago...when no one read it but me...and while blogging alone is okay, it's not nearly as fun as the blogging community that I have found and grown to love. However, and you all know what I am going to say next, don't you---now, I feel I have to censor everything I write. Sometimes I am not too kind, or perhaps I don't want to be...but I cannot bring myself to say things that I know will be repeated to the wrong party or even read by the wrong party in the first place. Hurt feelings are never anything I enjoy, whether they are my feelings, or me hurting someone else. Yes, I do know the rule about not saying anything at all if I have nothing GOOD to say, but then I feel compelled to ask myself why I have this blog in the first place. So, I don't know what to do. I know that many of you have handled this problem by writing by invitation only. I am not sure that's for me. I have discovered in the past two years that it's totally impossible to be anonymous. We all think we can, we think we can outsmart everyone, and maybe many of you do, but I don't like the idea of hiding...and I know I am making this sound as though I am hiding something really bad from everyone, and that is not the case at all. It's merely that sometimes I want to speak my mind and frankly, I cannot. So, I will wrestle with this problem for a bit and get back to you all on it, okay?

In the meantime...many, many things happening here.

New furniture delivered this Friday---I am so looking forward to having it. Mark is not, however, you all should see the long face, he tells me because we have to move everything once again, all around this apartment...to make things work. I am not so sure that's the reason...but he was all for the purchase, so beats me.

Bill is out of the hospital temporarily---I don't think I told you all the original problem but it is his heart. He needs a FIVE bypass operation, but they cannot do it until his head heals. He did such damage to his brain that giving him the required blood thinners for the operation would cause his brain to bleed again, and perhaps kill him. So, he has to wait about six weeks for the surgery. In the meantime, he has been fitted with some kind of outer defibrillation vest, very expensive, very high-tech, that he will not wear. He has been warned that without it, he may well die. He is not allowed to lift anything heavier than a tv remote...and that of course caused him to quip "well what will I do when I have to pee, then?" Typical Bill. Please say a prayer that he hangs on until he can have the operation and that after he feels better than new...K?

I am after all, going back into the insurance business, assuming the company will have me, and I won't know for a couple of weeks, after all the background checks and such. Since there is nothing in my background that would keep them from hiring me, in my mind, it's pretty much a done deal. I probably won't get started until mid September or so, but that's okay, since I have been working pretty regularly at the ICS---which we will be closing for the season in a few days.

I spent a good portion of the day yesterday, pinning down our vacation plans. I don't know if I told you all or not, but I promised Miss Stephanie--my youngest's gf---a trip to Las Vegas for her birthday as soon as she turned 21. Well, that is happening the middle of next month - and some time ago, we decided to include the rest of the family---so all of us--Me, Mark, Janelle and Nick, Craig, Jordy and Steph and Mark's best friend will all head to Vegas the first full week of October. It will be a wonderful time. Soul and Soul-man are supposed to join us there, too. Doesn't that sound great? I do not fly unless I'm forced, and even then, not so much. So Mark and I and his best friend will drive --- and I made plane reservations for the rest of them yesterday. Teehee...there is a method to my madness...now I do not have to spend two full days of driving with all my kiddos, fighting, complaining, bitching, moaning...you see, none of them have really grown up. And it makes sense for all of them, it saves them so much time, work-wise. Mark and I have always enjoyed the drive, for us, it's as much fun as the destination. I had to swallow really hard when I made the plane reservations and the hotel reservations---four rooms, three nights, ugh...the dollar amounts hurt. I can spend money like no one...right from the chair here at my desk. All I can say is, they had all better have a really, REALLY good time.

So that's enough for now. I hope I haven't ran any of you off in my absence. Have a great, GREAT day.

17 comments:

SOUL said...

i'm still here--and i'm FIRST !!!!
woo hoo !!!!

SOUL said...

ok-- i'm back-- just had to stay first-- {evil grin}

lots goin on in your world i see---
lots of changes comin up-- again.
one of these days your life will level out and you can "wear your sandals, and be normal, and go out to lunch!"
i promise.

see you in vegas bebe` !!!!

OXOX

have a happy day--- you're due- dammit-:))

ps-- you already know how i feel about shuttin your blog-- so i aint sayin a word. except just think before you jump. and if you close it don't delete it-- just lock it up- really- you will miss the comments here if you delete it. k.

love ya-

Smocha said...

Glad to see you're back!

Wow does Vegas sound exciting.

Hope you don't shut down your blog.You could always make a second blog for the private stuff.

I still have my old blog (password required) where I could do that. But apparently I am such an airhead ...I don't have any private stuff.
My mind is full of song lyrics to songs I don't even know, meowing songs in cat speak, or whistling about the casons.

Maybe it's true...ignorance really is bliss:)

Happy humpday!

bonnie said...

One thing you can do is make your blog by invitation only. But then you'll miss out on the fun of stalkers. People have to request to read your blog.

I loved Vegas. It was very sexy. I took Jess for her 21st birthday. Her favorite part was drinking gucci martinis at the sushi bar. It's so exciting that you are going.

Terri said...

oh and you forgot to make my hotel reservation in LV for Nov...darn!

what is IRL? I read your post and want to guess In Real Life? If so, people you know in real life found your blog w/o you telling them? That concerns me a little bit sometimes but then I think hey if they thought they knew me and are surprised by what they read, then they didn't really know me. Please don't censor yourself Jamie - your a great read!

Jessica said...

Sounds like a great trip!!!

I started blogging because it was a venue for uncensored words. I write a lot less now because I'm always asking "Is this anyone's business? Is it the business of people I don't even know?" It's hard. The blog is a great place to vent but maybe I should just stick to a journal...

Just Me said...

I also have a "bitch blog" because some things just have to be private. Writing about it gets it off my chest and people who read my "regular blog" wont ever know what a total turd I can be sometimes! :)

Driving to Las Vegas from Iowa! You're brave. lol I hate to fly too but driving to Vegas from where I live is the most BORING drive ever. If I have to choose between 7 hours of nothing but mountains and joshua trees or 45 minutes of sheer terror in the sky, I choose terror!

ac said...

You couldn't run me off with a stick!

Karen said...

Gee that's a tough one Jamie re the people IRL reading your blog. Trust me you wouldn't enjoy being private. Been there, done that, it ruins the whole experience in my opinion. Part of the fun of blogging is making new friends and just think of all the friends you wouldn't have now if you'd been private from the start. We were all newbies once.

If worse comes to worse you could have a private blog as someone suggested for the stuff you wouldn't like the RL folks to know.

I'm personally glad you're back and I hope you stay around. You and Soul together in Vegas...woohoo. Look out Las Vegas!!!

Golden To Silver Val said...

Welcome back Jamie! I sure have missed your wonderful posts but was glad to see your comments pop up here and there on mine...so I knew you were ok. This Vegas trip sounds like a lot of fun...like I told Soul, I'll be with y'all in spirit. If you gamble, I hope you win BIG.
My neighbors are getting their carpets cleaned AGAIN and the noise is about driving me NUTTY! They are either awful clean or awful dirty, I can't quite figure it out. LOLOLOLOLOL. They don't even have pets!!!!! Maybe its cause her carpet is WHITE. Mine is the color of dirt....oh wait...maybe that IS dirt. LOL....I'm feeling frisky today so I shall go see what trouble I can get into. Have a wonderful day. Hugs, Charlotte

fiwa said...

I know what you mean about people reading your blog. It's hard to balance saying what you need or want to say with hoping it doesn't hurt anyone's feelings. I hope you don't decide to shut down completely - I would really, really miss you.

Re Vegas - that is so exciting, you are going to have a wonderful time. You smart lady - driving with your hubby.

hugs -
fiwa

Lynx217 said...

First of all, you may want to set up a private blog that only people you invite can read. Myself and several other bloggers I know have done this. This allows you to vent and not worry about who's reading it that'll be offended.
As for Vegas, you will love it. Be sure to check out the Stratosphere and the laser light show. You will love it if you're into light shows set to music. But it's been over a decade since I was there (the stratosphere was still under construction rofl), so who knows what's changed since then - a lot I am sure. Enjoy yourself!

Brad said...

Glad to see your post. It's unfortunate that your in the position to have to second guess yourself and watch what you say here. Thinking back I can remember anything that would offend, but maybe I'm clueless.

I'm just glad to have you back!

I'll say a prayer for Bill.

Cheryl said...

I'm with everyone here...just glad to hear from you. Don't go away. And I can't think of anything you've ever written that's offending. Or maybe it's because you haven't written what you wanted and that's the problem.

I don't remember who I've given my blog address to. My mom wants it but I said no!

Good news on the vacay! It will be a blast. I wanna go...

CRUSTY MOM-E said...

I agree with Soul...but it is your blog..and if you do go private may I please have an invite?

Bill's comment had me laughing---such a typical male..they learn early about anatomy jokes I'm realizing!

VEGAS!! I LOVE VEGAS!! IF you were my aunt I bet you'd have taken me for my 21st. I'm glad you're doing that for your Stephanie (hope that someday she'll be your D=i=L!)

and you get to see soul too! How cool!


I do know what you mean though back to the blog and outright openness...because even though it's a thought the people reading it (if directed at them) don't hear the tone of it and some are more sensitive to others and quick to jump down your throat..but please please don't give it up.

Okay, I'm off to pack Jack's lunch.
:(,
Elizabeth

Portia said...

I know JUST what you're saying about the blogging, actually I think anyone with a blog does. I fear mine is shallow and calendar-like but just can't bring myself to put much more out there.

Anyway, I'm glad you have some good times to look forward to! I will look forward to hearing about them:)

Bill's a funny guy huh? I like him too:) I hope he's not too stubborn for his own good and is on his way to being recovered.

desert dirt diva said...

where are you staying in vegas???i had such a great time...i loved harrahs nickel machines...I can not wait to go back.. not only would i love just being in vegas , but i would also get to see my grandson.......soon..in a few months maybe....and please don't shut your blog down.. i have'nt been the most loyal reader.. to anyone , but i do try to read you everyday.....