Friday, February 02, 2007

OOOH...A Falsetto Child!

Good Morning Readers, I just realized that I have not blogged recently about the condition of my children----not that I haven't had plenty to say, but things are sort of going along in a straight line for them. Not necessarily in the right direction, but a straight line, nonetheless. So, I being one that's grateful for small favors, have just let the sleeping dogs lie. but nothing has changed in the way that i feel, or the worry that I have daily. YS is working, but at a meager paying job that he likes, but his hours are quite few. GF is towing the line in that household, and while she has not said anything to that effect, I worry that she is going to decide that it's easier to support one than two. He says he is currently looking for something different, I hope he is. No one needs that much time on their hands. D is going to school and is supposed to be going back to her old job in a new location, but so far nothing, and no one needs that much time on their hands. OS is still sucking in the unemployment funds, and seems to be quite happy with the status quo, but no one needs that much time on their hands. What, me worry? I should have an update on all, if not, most, of them after tonight, as I think we are all meeting for dinner in the dutch village. So stay tuned....

I am worn out beyond belief this morning. This workweek has been at least a month and three days long. I have accomplished much, and am beginning to see a little light at the end of the tunnel, we will have to see if it's actually an oncoming train. In all honesty, I have worked about thirteen days straight, that might be why the week seems long. Owner should be back the first of the week, but that only provides other issues for me. He called last night from Florida, at the race track, I could hear the cars in the background, it sure made me wish for warm weather, and racing season. Soon baby, soon.

I am sure that H is feeling a little neglected recently, but it has been ALL and I mean ALL that i can do to drag my tired ass to work int he mornings, and fall on the couch at night. I am quite proud of myself for this, as in the past few weeks, I have been virtually UNable to do that at all. However, I think he is feeling like i don't like him much, and that is not the case. I have tried to explain, but I wonder what he really feels. He picked my weary ass up from work last night, and it was a gesture that I appreciated, I am really not sure I could have gotten myself home. But a comment was made that he had to "babysit" me. And that was the wrong thing to say. I will not let him drive me anywhere anymore, I don't give a shit if I AM too blind to see the oncoming semi truck. Fuck that. When I am no longer able to utter a coherent word, when I have drool running down the front of my mis-buttoned shirt, when I shit myself....then I will allow a babysitter, and then, it WILL NOT be him. I am certain that he wishes he had used a different choice of words. If he doesn't, then he will. At times, I wonder what the hell I do what I do FOR. I am not now nor have I ever been fucking incapable of ANYTHING. Doesn't mean that I won't be someday, but he will be nowhere near when that happens. I once read a book about a club, quite exclusive, that literally ran your ass down and murdered you when your pre-determined time came around. There really could be some use to that, and it made me wonder at the time if there really were such a thing. Hmmm...

For now, I am off. (Actually, I have been off for quite some time, but that's another matter.) I need to get going. This day will be long, but aren't they all?

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