Saturday, December 23, 2006

Ten Lords 'a Leaping

Christmas Eve, Eve. It's so hard to believe that the end of the year is right on top of us, that the Holidays could possibly be here. Part of that is the fact that the weather has been like spring or early fall, not that I am complaining, but it makes Christmas seem off, sort of. I hate the cold and snow, and we have had none of that, but that is what is expected at Christmas time.

The day yesterday went perfectly. I had a great day, and I think all the kids did, as well. My dinner was great, I worked my rear end off and couldn't have done it all without H's help. No one left here hungry. D did make it down, but she is still not up to par, I am hoping that she will be all the way better by today. They watched movies, and spent time just hanging out here. OS came in long enough to eat, he had played basketball most of the day, so he was in his element. Ys and GF had been here since the evening before, I enjoyed having them around. She had to leave early to go to work, I was sorry she couldn't stay for dinner. All in all, it was a good day. I was pretty worn out by the time everyone went home, but then we went out anyway. I had a fun time but it wasn't a good night. I think some of the shininess of that place is beginning to wear off, it just isn't the fun it used to be. We have spent the last several New Years Eve's there, but I am beginning to like the idea of just staying home and having a quiet one this year-I will have to think about it. H would probably love that idea, we haven't talked about it yet. Must be my age showing.

Tomorrow will be the big day around here, all the family will be coming at one time or another. My mom and R, my sister and family, and all my kids. I am praying that my mom will be able to make it this year. Her health is not good, she is scheduled for angioplasty (sp?) on the 22nd of January. I am not sure that any of them will be able to be here at the same times, and that will be different this year, but I am just grateful that they should all be able to make it at all. Os and D will stay over on Sunday night, in fact OS will show up here tonight, and probably go home on Tuesday. On Christmas day, we will probably just be very lazy, and try and get rid of some of the leftovers that I know we will have from the day before, as well as from yesterday. I still have a considerable amount of cooking to get done, today and tomorrow. That's a tough thought at the moment, as I really could barf if I thought about it too much. It's getting to be a habit, waking up sick every morning. All the fun of being pregnant without the baby, of course. I suppose it's the medication that I am taking, but it's really pissing me off.

I am really trying to work on the Christmas feeling, I am lacking in that this year. In all the years past, I have been very excited about the gifts that I have bought, the surprises that i had in store for the others. This year, I have bought so much less, no one needs any of it, and I really can't afford what I did buy. So the thrill of giving isn't there, and that's what I love. Most of what I have was requested, and therefore pretty much expected from my kids. YS wanted money, no fun there, OS wanted us to donate his gift money to the Empty Stocking program, that made me really proud, but there is no surprise in that. D really didn't want anything and I got her a few surprises, but what she really wants this year, I can't give her. I am sad that she is sad, and I can't help her. There are things under the tree for them to open, but none are too exciting. H and I agreed no gifts, we will buy a recumbent stationary bicycle that we both want after the holidays. I know that it isn't about presents, but for me it IS about giving. And financially, I am all gived out. I hate to sound like I do, I am such a lucky woman, I have the best, and if you read this at all, you know that I am aware I do. I guess I just need children in my life. Maybe someday. My two year old niece will be here tomorrow night, that should be fun, but she doesn't love me too much yet.

Well, I should get with it, it's after nine. I am happy not to go to work this morning. I hope your day is terrific, mine really should be.

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