Friday, February 10, 2012

Still here. Yep here. Yes, I'm still here. Still here. Oh -- still here.

Nope - I haven't fallen off the face of the earth, although I can't say that doesn't sound more appealing that what I have been up to.Because , what I have been doing is nothing with a capital effin' N. (Nothing). I have been here, in this house, day in--day out. Day in, then out. Day innnnn then outtttttt. You get the idea. I have been H-E-R-E.

In fact, I am in a little bit of shock right now, as i was thinking about writing this and I realized all the weeks that I have NOT been writing, and all the weeks of doing not-a-damned-thing has gone by. Many weeks. This whole disability things blows. Just sayin'.

Not to say I am not happy that I don't have to try and go to work right now, because like so many weeks before, there is no way I could manage that. But --- not being well enough to go to work---well, let me just say right now, I'd trade anyone who thinks this might be kinda' nice. You would be sadly mistaken. Being home because you want to be, because you are happy that way, because you have all kind of fun things to do instead of working, well that's a different matter. Being home because you are effectively left with no choice --- that just plain old blows. Bites. Sucks. Or any other oral sort of verb you would like to place here.

I am still not receiving money from my insurance company but finally it has all been approved  - (I sure as hell hope), and things should be moving along soon.

I have a new body component, and I am not too sure how I feel about it. So far, it's literally been a pain, and there really has been little upside. I keep hoping that will change. I have a lump on my be-hind the size of half  of a softball, and a lump on my spine the size of half of a golf ball. Both places hurt like you know what, and that really isn't getting any better. The machine itself at times I think helps me, other times, it irritates the you know what out of me. I have had a couple of issues as a result of the surgery that don't make me a bit happy, but to spare you TMI, I will keep that to myself. Let me say though, that one of the issues is really quite life altering, and I am none to happy about it. Medication is keeping it in check right now, but geez, I don't need any help, thank you very much, things are breaking and not working quite nicely all on their own.  :(

Aside from all this fun and light-heartedness, life is good! How are things with you all?

I'll be back. Promise.


Steve Finnell said...

you are invited to follow my blog

Julianna said...

Good to see you are still alive and well. I have also been away for a bit... posting when I can, trying to catch up when I can.

I swear one of these days I will reserve time to sit in bed all day and catch up with everyone. Sadly, the kids won't have it... something about wanting to eat and all. :)

Try to carve out sometime to write and read to keep the stir crazy at bay. It will help, promise.

welcome to my world of poetry said...

Lovely to hear from you Jamie, sorry things are not too good,
It must be awful to have no choice as to do want you want. Please write again soon as there are lots of us out here to like to hear what you have to say,


Lena said...

Been thinking and thinking about you, so glad to see a post! I am sorry things are not going to well, I sure hope things turn around for you!!!

I know exactly what you mean about being home from work because you have to be and not being able to do anything. I so get that from my experiences with chemo. I am so sorry you are in such pain and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!

ON The Road Again said...

been worried about you, hoping you were ok, glad you are back.

Coffeypot said...

At least you are still here. And doing nothing is a job that is never done. I am involved in that practice and, dammit, I'll have to go back tomorrow and finish up doing nothing that I didn't do today. It is a never ending cycle.

Leann said...

I have missed you SOOOOO much. I am happy that you are back to blogging. I can't imagine having a lump the size of half a softball on my tushie. That must bite big time!! I hope that the pain and inconvenience work out to be well worth it in the future....the near right now :-)

Take care Jamie and have a blessed day.

Cheryl said...

I think about you often and mean to write you. So much for good intentions, huh? I hope you still count me as your friend! And if you can blog, it gives me hope to get up off my lazy butt(without a big lump)and blog too.

Wishing you some real fun!

Josie Two Shoes said...

How about a little fun distraction? Remember "One Question Wednesday"? Frank and I have resurrected it beginning this week, and we're looking for participants (read my current blog post for details). If you feel up to playing, here's my question for you to answer..."As the Grandma to two awesome little boys, what would be your fantasies/dreams for their grown up lives in the future, what would you wish for them?"

Maria said...

Jamie~I've been thinking about you alot. Hoping that you were well & that you'd post something so we could all rest easy. It sucks, what you're going through. I, too, who pray for some time off now & then, find myself forced to stay at home & not able to do much of anything. Nothing more frustrating! Just try to keep your spirits up, hard as that may be. Spring is almost here. Warm weather & all that good stuff. Keep us posted & stay strong.

Josie Two Shoes said...

Come back Jamie! We miss you so much! Post a line or two just to let us know you're among the living! Has Spring sprung in Iowa yet? Have you been able to get out of the casa at all? There's not a day that I don't think of you and offer up a prayer for better days. Check in please, you are loved here!