Saturday, February 03, 2007

No rest for the wicked

Hey there blog readers - this day has been long and hard, not good for a Saturday. I am at work, still at work, we have been closed for nearly two hours, and here I sit, still working hard. Or writing this, however you want to look at it. At least now I don't have to come in tomorrow, working one Sunday in a two-Sunday period is plenty for me. I am getting caught up. And I can spend the whole day tomorrow in that happy, happy place that is called home. (That was sarcasm, in case you missed it.)

It is freaking cold in here, colder out there. I hate winter, have I mentioned that before? It is a deepfreeze, currently. I will have to go out and start my car about a half hour before I want to leave, that is how cold it is here. YUK. If I had brown bottles in my trusty little office refrigerator, I think I would just stay here this evening. I am in no hurry to get back to my town, things don't feel too good there right now. I have some decisions to make, and I don't want to make them, and so for now, I am going to act as though I don't. All in due time, I suppose. I no longer know what I want, and frankly, I am mostly too tired to care. How sad is that?

Dinner out with the kiddos was good last evening. I always have fun with them, though it can be a little overwhelming. I miss each of them. More than I can even explain. I have not been centered or grounded in my life since they were younger and still needed me. I no longer know what my role is, and I thought that I would have that figured out by now. So many things seem to be running out of my control, and I am talking about things that I thought WERE in my control, so what the hell ever.

I think that is all i am going to say right now. I am tired, and my eyes aren't working, and the things that make perfect sense in my head are not making it to this page in the same condition. I will try again later. Hope your day has been good.

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