I had this whole, long "I am Jamie, and this is what makes me--ME" blog post written in my head - and have been working on it, mentally---for a couple of days. It was supposed to be a snap to get it here, in the little bloggy box. Only one problem - putting it together in my head left me sad and depressed and I realized....too much truth is not necessarily a good thing. I am me - and have become me by what I was born into, the genes I was lucky - or unlucky enough to to receive, and what I have lived. My depression came from a combination of both, I think. I have rarely talked or written completely of my past, and realize this morning that while at some point I may, it just doesn't serve any positive purpose. So, I am me - Jamie. And I am made of things that came before me, and things I lived after. Like Popeye the Sailor man---"I am what I am". While I continually strive for better than before, I have no control over what I was born with, or into--good (and there was a lot of that) or bad. I make each day as positive as I can, and really --- what else matters?
In other news --
I have been so busy at work. We are selling cars like crazy and that is a great thing. I like being busy but it has been so much so that I feel like I cannot get caught up. Taking last Friday off didn't help, but I needed it and I accomplished much of what was needed so- it was worth it.
I have been feeling pretty down, mentally. Not particularly normal for me, at least if you ask me. There has been a bit more drama than I care to live around me, some of which even involved me. I cannot deal with it - refuse to, but sometimes it hits you right smack in the face and there I was. It has taken me a bit to get over it, and still some things on the fringe cries out with the D word. I hate it. I cannot handle it. It brings me down. At times I get a bit pissy with the actions of others, and occasionally with my own...enough said. Enough all around, and I am working on my own attitude. A big job.
Depression brings out the pain - or the pain brings out the depression...either way, it hurts. Enough said about that, too. Yes, I am taking medications that make all of it better..
Have a great Tuesday. I'm gone. :)