Wednesday, November 28, 2007

The faucet still flows

This will have to be short, my hands are not cooperating this morning, but I want to tell you about two different encounters I had at work yesterday. One because it was terribly humiliating, and I really learned from it---maybe you all will too. The other, because it proves what Soul and so many others are saying, and it was so odd, it gave me chills and then made me cry. Although most things made me cry yesterday...

So the first thing I refer to was that I had my first "disabled" experience yesterday. I was sitting in the garage at work, in that damned wheelchair of course, and the man that takes care of our health insurance renewal that is also a customer came in, he was there to drop off his car for service work. He brought in his girl friend with him, and I had never met her, although I know Sam pretty well. He walked over to me, and introduced her. She leaned down to my face level, and said very loudly "I am so HAPPY to meet you", like I was deaf, dumb, blind....I don't know what she was thinking. Her voice had this sickeningly sweet tone that you would use with a child. Sam was quite startled and very quickly turned to her and said, "it's only her back". There was more to this conversation, but the point is this--if you are one that assumes anyone in a wheelchair is disabled to the point of idiocy, please, please stop. It was quite humiliating. Once the shock wore off, I went to my office and cried. I realized I should have been crying for her stupidity, rather than myself, but it was one of those I'm going to cry no matter what kind of days.

Thing number two, that happened just before I left that also had me in tears in my office: A service customer, in fact---a teacher--english, I think, that all of my kids had in school, who really is quite sweet, I have always thought so, but all three of mine tell me she was a rough one- but anyway, asked me very kindly...."the last time I was here, you were barely able to walk. I don't mean to pry, but are you okay?" I told her the story, and I had never really talked with her, other than hello, how are you---that kind of thing, but we spent probably about ten minutes talking, she told me about some of the struggles she had with her mother when she was in a wheel chair, it was that kind of conversation...then she said, "what is your first name?" I told her. She said that she and her husband had been PRAYING for me for weeks, but only knew me by the girl at the dealership (insert dealership name here) and by OS's mom (insert oldest son's name here) and she felt sure that God knew who they meant, but she would like to have my name, for future prayer about the surgery and my recovery. I was stunned, especially after Soul had just told me in my comments about the hundreds of people that I didn't even know that are praying for me daily. And then had Val commented that she was...and I didn't even know that Val was out there...it was a very emotional day. And that is only talking about a few, what about all of you who have been with me through out this whole ordeal? What can I even say to any of you?

It has been a very emotional week. I don't know what the deal is, today is starting off no better, and by that I mean, no drier. I can only thank you all once again, for all the love and support and true friendship that you show, and I want you to know that one day I will return it. Have a really good Wednesday. :)

22 comments:

Amanda said...

((((((((((Jamie))))))))))

Yup, that was VERY educational. Thank you for posting it. I hope you'll have a great Wednesday too.

JYankee said...

Yes that was. I really hate stupidity in people. And it's not even physical. When you don't understand what people say over here..they automatically think you're deaf...."I can HEAR just fine! Idiot....." That's no where near as bad as what you faced..but highly annoying all the same. I hope that that woman gets a bit of her own back at her...some day..some day... praying for ya from over here too... (((hugs)))

Gypsy said...

I know what you mean about people being so kind. I have quite often sat here with tears rolling down my cheeks when I'm going through a rough patch and the support starts rolling in. I hope you feel how much we all love you Jamie and we all want you to recover fully from this awful ordeal you have been going through.

Some people are a bit clumsy when they think someone is disabled in some way but lets hope she didn't mean to offend. I'm guessing she would be mortified if she knew how much her behaviour effected you.

Hope today is a bit better for you and cry all you want. Its good for you.

Golden To Silver Val said...

Your post brought tears to my eyes. God wants you to know how many are out there talking to Him about you. Be strong, have faith...never give up. We'll keep praying. I greatly admire you for going into work and trying hard to carry on. Things will be better soon. They will. Big hugs. Val

SOUL: said...

first/ before i forget again...yep--i had to go back and read the line again... crap now i have to again! cuz i already blabbed too much... :))

"I want you to know that one day I will return it. "

ok..THAT

you already DO!
everyday... all the time. you just don't know it. we know you care about us. geesh. you don't OWE us anything. don't feel like you do. ok? "good heavens" LOL
i love it when you say that btw.

nobody prays for you out of duty or obligation. or certainly out of expectation. don't feel indebted because people care about you.

just "feel the love"

and get better.

take care of YOU, and let God do the rest. ok?

luv you
me

Josie Two Shoes said...

I have seen that same thing happen so often with our clients and work and people out in public, Jamie. Idiots assume that one problem automatically means there's more. My heart goes out to you, that had to be humiliating. With a little time you will become more immune to the ignorance of strangers. I'm so glad that God sent that lady to remind you of how many people really do care about you and pray for you every day. I can't think of a better way to spend my prayer time, and I'm very sure God knows exactly in what direction to send those blessings we're asking for. Tears are pretty normal reaction to your situation, but I believe the day is going to come when you'll have reasons to smile again,and I want it to come SOON! Here's my (((hugs))) too, have we squished you with them yet? :-)

Leann said...

Bless your heart.

I found you thru Annabell's blog.

Know that I am praying for your swift recovery. I have not read back far enough to know why you are in a wheelchair, but prayers your way regardless.

Blessings
Leann

Summer said...

I have personally experienced the power of prayer and the grace of His love. He's 17 now.

You're in mine.

Cheryl said...

I see a lot of ignorance, but also a lot of really kind people, as you've seen. I think tears can be really good sometimes. Cleansing. You're going through a really emotional time right now, and it's natural.

You give so much, and you're so caring. It's no wonder people are so supportive and care about you.

Portia said...

That is an awesome story about the lady who asked your name. The power of prayer is amazing.
And I would be stunned too, as far as that silly woman goes. I'm sorry you had to put up with that.
I hope Thursday finds you smiling:)

simonsays said...

Hey Amanda! You are right, we can all learn from it.

simonsays said...

Jyankee, I have known people like that here. It really irritates me, too.

Thanks for your prayers---

simonsays said...

Gyspy, I know she didn't mean anything by it, really she didn't.

And yes, I certainly do feel all the love and prayers that you all are sending my way, at times, it's really, really hard to believe. And I mean that in a good way. :)

And don't worry, it seems once i turned the damned faucet on, it will not turn off!

simonsays said...

Hello my new friend Val--thank you so much for all your support and prayers. It really does mean all the world to me.

simonsays said...

And Soul, what can I say to you that we haven't covered in one of our million conversations? You already know what I think and how I feel :) and "good heavens". xo

simonsays said...

And Soul, what can I say to you that we haven't covered in one of our million conversations? You already know what I think and how I feel :) and "good heavens". xo

simonsays said...

Josie, I know you know what I am talking about, I'm sure you see it everyday.

And I cannot tell you how much I appreciate all of your suppost over all this time. It's been a while now, hasn't it? We are part of the original three!

simonsays said...

leann- welcome! I am happy to have you here, and I want you to know it isn't always this much of a downer, and it won't be for long. Come back soon!

simonsays said...

Summer, that is the sweetest thing to say---again I tell you TYM is a lucky, lucky kid to have you for a mom, and i am a lucky woman to have you for a friend. :)

simonsays said...

Cheryl, you are right, but it's time to turn the faucett off, for heavens sake! Thank you for being here for me.

simonsays said...

Portia---there you are!

I am looking forward to a better day today, I will take what I can get. You have a good one too. :)

SOUL: said...

Good LOrd Jamie---
i have NEVER seen you talk soooo much in your box!
i am hoping that is a good thing.
it is for me. i think you are feeling the strength now...
it's only gonna get stronger...and so are YOU!!!!

OXEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
please find some smiles in your world today???
we all want you to be happy, despite the pain, and all you face, and endure.

we LOVE you!

ps... i don't know why this just hit me... wither i heard it in AA, or i read it somewhere----
but

"fear faced diminishes."

really, i have found that to be true.

for instance, the other day when i sat here in fear over this house thing.... then we got UP-and OUT--- and looked at places...
God gave us the perfect place.
i am even beginning to wonder if it isn't something we might consider buying someday.
hmmmmm.

let yourself feel every prayer , every thought, and ALL the strength within yourself....
because it is all there for the taking... and it is what is gonna pull you through this.

crying doesn't make you weak. so many of us would have laid down weeks--even months ago ... some have even admitted that to you. me included.
you are tougher than you give yourself credit for.

besides... the tears might just help you read better!
i sure can't read, and i have found a book i wish i COULD read for once!

anyhow--- got a sock?
i can't shut up!!!

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