Tuesday, September 19, 2006
SO many things to REMEMBER.
NOT so off to a good start. Not well this morning, have a doctor's appt because I have freakin' pneumonia, or some shit. I HATE when I am sick, it really, really upsets the rules, which are obviously, that I make the decisions that involve ME. AND taking the time to get better or just to feel like hell is NOT what I decided. In general things are okay, kids are home from big adventure, in one piece-that's always good, youngest son is moving to an ACCEPTABLE apartment this weekend, none of the businesses that I am in control of have gone under, husband is relatively well, no big problems this week, SO, generally okay. But I am buried in things that have deadlines, and they are FAST approaching. SO much to do, so little time. And I am so damned tired. I am middle aged, how i hate admitting that!, and I work too much, worry too much, very little, if any downtime. I wouldn't even recognize downtime if i had it. I have been on this cycle of hurry, hurry, hurry for so many years. I am not sure if that is entirely my fault, I suppose it is, most of my problems have been created by me. But now things have got to change. I am getting too tired to deal with all of it-how can such a (self) control freak get into such a mess? My Mom can fix it. My daughter can fix it. My wife can fix it. My boss can fix it. My sister can fix it. My GM can fix it. Who the hell ever said that I can fix anything?