Saturday, August 04, 2007

Damnit. Damnit all to hell.

I am not feeling so happy this morning. What should have been a really great day/evening yesterday was once again ruined by the attitude/moodiness of my H.There was no fighting because I refuse. I just shut my mouth. I am so tired of it. I was married to an irrational man for more than fifteen years the first time around, and I will not go through it again. Enough said.

I think I may just take this day off to work on my own house, heaven knows it could use it. I am not really physically up to that or painting the other one btw, but I need to do something constructive today or I will explode. I just don't think that H and I being in the same little house with paint between us is a good scenario from my viewpoint. You just never know where that paint might end up...

I am sitting here fuming---and mad at myself for letting that happen. I KNOW that i am the one that controls how I feel, but I have had so damned many wasted days in this relationship, and you know---all of our days are numbered. Why must problems be created when there really aren't any?


Summer said...

My feeling about this is that some people aren't happy unless there is some sort of problem or turmoil going on. They are uncomfortable with peace and quiet because it doesn't feel normal to them. So, they create it. Our problem is that when we get hooked up like people this is that we spend a lot of time standing in the middle of the floor asking WTF?

SOUL: said...

i think you got it there summer. also men, definitely creatures of habit, and also... extremely "attention seeking". it doesn't matter to them what type of attention..just "pay attention to me!"
they will be silent, slam doors or cabinets, stomp around...all without a damn word...then get even MORE pissed...cuz we don't know, or ask them "what's the matter hunny, what can i do?"
i hate it when they get like that...and YES mine does it too. i don't blog about his baby boy attitudes very often...but they all do it. and for what???/
everything could be going just fine...then they gotta get a stick up their A** just cuz they think they need attention. well in my house negative breeds negative. on both sides. if i'm an ass...he's an ass...if he's an ass...i'm an ass.
if my kid is an ass..the entire house is an ass.
perhaps you going to paint the other place isn't a bad idea. take a radio...listen to your old country music...perhaps bring along a sixer even. make it a day for YOU.
a jamie day.
a i can do it on my own...without your cry baby bullshit hunny!
they do finally get the hint. eventually. somewhat. a little bit. that you aren't gonna just sit around and watch or listen to them be an ass.
when mine gets like that... i go to my room and shut the door...or i go "run errands"...or go fishin!
but i aint sittin around watchin some unprovoked ass attack.
speak up, or i'm movin on to something more peaceful.
ok there's my little "man rant" .

but... i do have a question... why is it that women go on cleaning frenzies or some such thing when we get pissed... but men... just sit and sulk...and fill the entire house ass-air?

i hope your day gets better. much better.
h will get over it and he will live. you don't have to fix it. or him. let him fix it himself this time. just don't let him suck you into his baby fits...and they will ease up. they never go away...we all know that. but once you show that you aint sittin around goin down with him... he'll learn. eventually.
mine's gettin better...and only took 100 years.

simonsays said...

lol Summer---and you are so right. I do that WTF thing alot.

Soul-you also are quite correct, and you still make me laugh...particularly with your "if my kid is an ass, everyone is an ass comment..." thanks for the words of wisdom....

JYankee said...

I think the same... i used to worry and everything when mine got into those "fits"...but now I just ignore it and go about my business and they eventually return to "normal"...dont even get sucked into that kind of crap..not worth it.

Josie Two Shoes said...

Oh Lord, I hear you Jamie. Have been in this situations so many times. All plans for a lovely day/evening together go out the window and leave you wondering not only WTF, but why you even bothered. I HATE MOODY PEOPLE! And they can say what they want about women and their mood swings, but I swear men are far worse. Yes, ideally we wouldn't let it get to us, but then again why should we have to deal with it at all? The sweet man I knew and the moody, miserable one I ended up with were so far apart that at times I can hardly reconcile the two in my mind. You are wise to avoid a painting party today. Not only does your body need the rest, not more to strain it, but H just might end up with a bucket of paint over his head. (Well, hey at least you can picture it in your mind - I used to fantasize about stuff like that - just one good punch in the mouth, just one! - Better than the "burning bed" fantasy, right??! :-)

Treat yourself to a nice day, Jamie, a little housework ok, then find your favorite book, or take that new bike for a short spin. YOu deserve some down time!

And give yourself extra credit for not letting last night's moodiness escalate into a war between you. We get so damn good at that - keeping the peace, don't we? But after awhile one gets tired of tiptoeing on glass, so as not to offend the offensive butthead.

simonsays said...

I love you guys. :)

Josie Two Shoes said...

Soul made a very interesting and true point here... when women are upset and moody, they get busy and work themselves out if it - men just sit around and sulk and make everyone else miserable. Women ARE the stronger sex, and the smarter one - we all know that!! :-)

SOUL: said...

good lord, i just came by to see how things were going... i had NO idea i blabbed SOOOOO much on here earlier. i just spewed my rant and left. gosh. sorry. i told ya..sometimes i just can't shut up.
but i love ya.
hope your day got better! lots bettah..mine did..go see!

Josie Two Shoes said...

Soul, you don't give yourself enough credit for half the good stuff you say. Damn girl, you know A LOT about life and making a go of it, I too loved your comments about being asses - and it's true, all true! Please don't ever duct tape that mouth! :-)

SOUL: said...

josie, it's not my mouth that gets me in's my FINGERS!!! :))